The magic happens when I don't listen to "should."

I'm so excited to be welcoming the wonderful Noelle Goggin as this week's resident guest blogger. Noelle is a spiritual coach and mentor who specializes in working with women who don't feel like they are enough (so... all of us at some point in our lives, am I right?). She's talking "shoulds" and freedom and letting go of the advice to find authenticity.

(P.S. Wondering why these beautiful entrepreneurial goddesses are guest blogging here at www.katekmccarthy.com this month? Check it out here.)


There is absolutely no shortage of opinions, advice and information in this world that we live in. 

Everyone has an answer on what you should be doing. People love to give advice. Of course they want to share what worked for them! You should do it too! Right? Well maybe not.

When we are stepping outside our comfort zone or into something new, it's wise to have some information, guidance and know-hows. It's like visiting a different city, you need a map to find your way around. You will also perhaps have recommendations of places to stay, things to do and where to eat. At some stage you are going to have to do your own thing so that you stop having someone else's holiday.

It's the same in your business. You have to stop listening to what you should do and find your own way.

From my recent experiences, it's when I don't listen to "should" that the magic happens.

Here’s how:

Last year, starting to create my coaching business from scratch, I bought some 'done for you' ideas and items to help me get started. Guest blogging was one thing I wanted to do and armed with my 25 titles, I sat, wrote and pitched to no avail.

In December, I wrote a blog based on a conversation that I had with friends and boom! it was published at TUT.com. I was mildly embarrassed when I saw it live -- "How the heck do I do it? - the balance thing." I had really meant to take out take out the word "heck,"  I thought I should.

But the magic happened without that "should," and I received a lot of positive feedback and made new connections.

At the beginning of this year, I had a rather inspired idea to create a mastermind. The inspiration took hold fast, and I went from idea to outline to sales page and onwards to filling my group within two weeks. I was delighted with myself, feeling totally in alignment with what I had achieved. Until I heard the rule that I had somehow missed that coaches should not create group coaching programs until they have a wait list of blah blah blah. Somehow I had missed that "should" and created a magical space for the women who wanted to work with me.

Then again the guest blogging magic happened. I submitted an article on my reflections of how the book, The Four Agreements by don Miguel Ruiz was possibly written for mothers of teenage girls. Not only did my article get published on TUT.com but was mentioned and 'lil old me quoted by Mike Dooley on his Facebook page. The thousands of likes, hundreds of shares and heartfelt comments from many mums who needed to hear my perspective that day told me that I shared what needed to be written. What beautiful souls needed to be validated? I'm not a relationship or mom coach. I should blog about the work I do - right? Apparently, not always.

I've learned via the "experts" that I should have one topic and key action according to the newsletter rule book. In my latest newsletter, that didn't happen either! I had so much news and free stuff to share, I did just that. Not only were there 0 unsubscribes but more magic! People actually replied to my email commenting how much they loved the content and were celebrating my wins with me.

I'm done with the "shoulds."

It's beyond the confines of "should" that I am expressing the real me. It's breaking the boundaries of "should" that I'm reaching people, in a way that is truly authentic to me. It's when "should" is gone that the magic begins to dance on my doorstep. 

There are doors opening for you when you are being the true you, you just cannot see them yet.

You should try being without the "shoulds"!! (pun intended)


Noelle Goggin is a Spiritual Coach & Mentor for women that don’t feel that they are enough. She teaches them to believe in themselves and trust in life so that they can be big and bold in the businesses and create lives that they really love.

You can find out more about Noelle and her work at www.noellegoggin.com and on Facebook.